Mila May Harper 5.27.2016

It is with the heaviest of hearts that we share with you that Mila May Harper was born Friday, May 27th, at just 18 weeks gestation, and our little girl is with the angels in heaven.

We found out at a routine 14 week ultrasound, the day after we closed on our new house, that Mila suffered from what they suspected was Spina Bifida, and was measuring very small. Thus we began mentally preparing ourselves for a difficult pregnancy, a child that would need pediatric surgery within hours of being born, and potentially life with a special needs child. But we could not have imagined the full gravity of our situation and how the following 4 weeks would unfold.

After numerous ultrasounds, doctor appointments at our normal OB and the University of Minnesota, meetings with genetic counselors, and invasive tests performed, it was confirmed that Mila actually suffered from Triploidy. A rare chromosome condition where she had 3 full sets of chromosomes, instead of 2. They told us this condition is “incompatible with life”, there are no survivors. All of the birth defects our sweet girl suffered were a symptom/side effect of this condition. Apparently Triploidy occurs in just 1% of conceptions, and of those 99% end in the first trimester, it is quite literally a miracle she made it to 18 weeks, our little girl is truly 1 in a million.

We feel so blessed that we were able to spend 18 weeks praying for her, watching our feisty little cookie do somersaults on ultrasounds, hear her strong heartbeat and get some amazing pictures of her in utero. We also feel truly blessed that God answered our prayers and took our little girl home, and that we were able to have her named, blessed, baptized and laid to rest. What a gift Connor has that his baby sister will look out for him from heaven.

We want to thank you all so much for your love and support during this immensely difficult time for our family. While our hearts are completely broken, we know that we are still truly and utterly blessed. 

Top 14 of 2014!

So I've been seriously lacking in my upkeep of the blog. I will blame it 100% on my tireless (ahem) dedication to completing Connor’s baby book. J Combined with the fact that for those of you with Facebook and Instagram, I have bombarded you with updates and pics of our little man and world traveler, I know, I’m that mom, my apologies. But in our annual tradition, I thought I would put our “best of the year” post out there, since I believe this to be our best one yet! Yes, I realize, I say this every year, and forgive me, for I’m sure it is a phrase I will repeat every year going forward, one can only hope! It’s long, feel free to skim…

Cheers to a happy, healthy and wonderful 2015 to you and yours!

Love, the Harper Crew

14. Connor’s Baptism: We kicked off 2014 by getting our little man baptized. It was a very special day, and we were lucky to share it with all members of our immediate families, including Connor’s Godparents, Frank and Gretchen McQuillan. We truly believe that Connor is the most amazing blessing either of us has ever received, and we hope to share with him faith and belief every day.

13. Daycare: As two kids whose mom’s stayed home with them, the concept of daycare was daunting, scary, and quite new for me and Mike. However, we have known since the day we stepped foot in Four Square Daycare and Preschool that they would love our little man as much as we do and we have never looked back. Connor has loved his time in the infant room and we are really going to miss it! We’re in the midst of the transition to the toddler room, and our little man loves it! Chasing the big kids, sleeping on a cot, and shoving his face full of food all on his own, he is one happy camper!

12. Trips to Iowa: We enjoyed several trips back to Iowa this year to visit friends! We showed Connor around the ISU campus, and told him all the stories of our time there, stories he will NEVER hear again J

11. St. Patrick’s day: I had so much fun celebrating my favorite holiday! We kicked it off by dressing up our little Irish man for a party, and then passed him off to Grandma and Grandpa Mac for our first overnight away. He did great, and both Mike and I had fun…possibly a little too much fun…

10. Trips to WI: We were able to head to Richland Center, WI, where Mike’s mom and dad are from, several times this year. Some were so much fun, where Connor brought unimaginable joy and smiles to his great grandparents. Some were harder, as we had to say goodbye to Mike’s Grandpa Eng this December, a great man, who will be dearly missed.

9. Cabin weekends: We are so lucky to have so many family and friends who graciously host us in their cabins in northern Minnesota. It is truly my favorite place to be, out on a lake in MN in the summer, and we are blessed to be able to spend so much time up there. (Don’t worry, we will pay you back when we buy our house on a lake…someday…)

8. Twins Games: This was a special summer of Twins Games. We were able to go to the All Star Game and Home Run derby! It was bittersweet as Amy and I have decided not to renew our season tickets, but you can bet we will still check out several games in the years to come, particularly with our main man Torii Hunter coming back!

7. Swimming Lessons: Connor LOVES to swim! We did a few rounds of swimming lessons at Wise Swim School in Apple Valley with our friends the Henry’s. Connor and Callen loved the water, and Mike and Shannon tolerated getting in their suits once a week while Nicole and I looked on from the sidelines. Connor almost got kicked out, as apparently babies with a serious spitting up problem tend to disagree with a pool, but he got it under control, and enjoyed every minute of it…only one time did he cause a cancellation of EVERY class following ours…way to go kid! L

6. Weddings: Another year, another boatload of weddings for me and Mike, but we love it! This year was no exception as we celebrated with friends and family who tied the knot! Connor also discovered his love of dancing…apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, or should I say trees…

5. Amma Baby outings: While on maternity leave, Connor and I met the most amazing group of moms, babies and their daddies. We have continued our friendship with this group and consider ourselves so lucky! From outings on boats, Happy Hours, a charity 5k, to a one year old celebration bash at a cabin up north with 14 adults and 8 one year olds, this group is the best!

4. Trips to Florida, Colorado, Napa: So Mike and I love to travel, and we always said that we hoped having a family would only add to this joy, not inhibit it, and we’ve stayed true to that, in year one at least. Connor has been a trooper on all trips and we are so fortunate. We’ve also taken a few without him, including scratching one of my most desired locations off the list with a trip to wine Country!

3. Cousin time: Before I became a crazy mom, I was a crazy Aunt, and I love my nieces and nephew like they were my own! It has been so fun to watch Connor interact with his cousins, especially to watch him and Emma as they are so close in age! They just started to really play with each other, rather than next to one another, and it is awesome!

2. Jobs: 2015 was a big year career wise. Mike had a bittersweet year, when he left Federated Insurance after 8 years there. He loved his time there, and especially the people, but it was time for a change, and a shorter commute! He started at Target in November, and is a Systems Engineer for the Replenishment team. Yes, we both drink the Kool-Aid now…no I did not recruit him, nor manipulate him in any way! On his last day at Federated, his team gave him an amazing red and khaki send off!!

1. Connor turned 1! By far the most exciting part of 2014 was when our little man turned 1. If you can’t tell (which I’m sure you can, given I can barely get thru 1 sentence of this post without mentioning him, I’m annoying, I know) Connor is the center of our world. We are truly blessed, truly amazed, and truly honored to be his parents! What an amazing year! 

Truly blessed momma

Well, I cannot describe how truly blessed I feel today. My first mother's day and birthday combined, was one amazing day! I am overwhelmed by the love I feel from family and friends, and the full weight of what it means to be a mom, really hit me today. I am so blessed to have the little man in my life who made me a mom just 6 months ago. I still find it hard to believe sometimes that I am a mom, and that Mike and I made this amazing little guy who lights up our life. He is more than we ever could have imagined, and being parents is the best and most important job either of us has ever had.

A huge thank you to all those who reached out today, I truly appreciate all of your friendship, love and thoughts! I am lucky to have you all in my life!

I thought I would also take this opportunity to update the blog with some more recent pics. We can hardly believe that our little man is turning 6 months tomorrow. Where has the time gone?! He is growing so much and changing every day! He has sprouted two bottom teeth, started sleeping through the night, and started eating some solid foods! He is a good eater, and not picky at all! We hope that continues!! :)

He also is loving enjoying the nice weather with long walks and runs in his jogger, swinging and sliding time at the park, and today he discovered grass! The fresh air definitely agrees with our little guy!

I hope that all of the moms, grandmas, and woman of every shape and size enjoyed a little love from the men in their lives today. I certainly enjoyed the love from my boys! Happy Mother's day all!

First time eating solid foods, he loved it! Grabbed the spoon and shoveled it in!

Our laundry loads have substantially increased!

Loved celebrating Emma Poo's 1st Birthday!!

She jumped right in to the cupcake!

Basically impossible to get a pic of all 4 of these crazy cousins!

Discovering grass...royally confused!

His Blue Steele look... :)

Spring has Sprung!

Spring has FINALLY arrived to Minnesota! It was a long and COLD winter! And while I was spoiled and got to spend a lot of it cuddling with my little baby inside on maternity leave, we were all ready to get outside and show Connor that we do go outside while in Minnesota!

The last couple of months have been an adjustment for all of us, but we are all getting into the swing of things! I went back to work, and it has been really good. The first week was hard, and I definitely shed some tears, but things have gotten much better and we've found our new groove! Connor loves going to daycare every day to play with his friends and teachers, and we absolutely love where he is at. I am so busy at work and love coming home to my boys every night and hanging out with them all weekend!

Our Happy Boy in the bouncer at daycare!

We have kept busy this spring with some fun trips and lots of time with family and friends! We took Connor's first road trip to Des Moines to meet his friend Betts Brandt, born 8 weeks after our little man! It was love at first sight! We have been down there twice, and got to meet his buddy Cooper Hitsman, 17 months older than Connor, on the second trip down! Our little man is not exactly "great" in the car, but he's not bad either, he just isn't one of those babies that sleeps as soon as you hit the road! I'm pretty good entertainment though in the back seat!

We also took his first plane ride and trip to the ocean! We decided to go to Florida in early March. With the weather being so cold, we had to get out of here to stay sane! My mom and brother Joe decided to join us, and it was a great time!

We also celebrated my favorite holiday in March, Saint Patrick's day! Connor celebrated his Irish heritage, and his middle name ("Mac" after my maiden name McQuillan)! He was our little McBaby! He also got to meet his Great Grandma Mac at Plum's! The McQuillans carried on the tradition of meeting up here to celebrate!

We have loved watching him grow and develop so much this spring! He is rolling all over, bouncing in his entertainer, blowing bubbles and trying to whistle and giggling up a storm! He is so fun to watch and play with!! He really get's a kick out of watching toddlers play with balloons and balls!

Finally, this past weekend we celebrated Connor's first Easter. We are so blessed to have Connor in our life, and we are continue to thank God for the precious gift he has given us in Connor. This Easter meant more to us than ever before, having our little man! We were lucky to be able to celebrate with lots of family, including my family on Friday night, and both sides of Mike's extended family in Wisconsin this weekend. Connor also got to meet another set of Great Grandparents, Great Grandma and Great Grandpa Eng. It was a special time, and we were lucky to catch these sweet moments on camera!

When we got home, we got to enjoy this beautiful 75 degree and sunny Minnesota evening with our little man! He got his Easter basket filled with treats (rice cereal :) ) and walk over to our neighbors. We ended with dinner and a drink on the deck with uncle Joe (the DOGfather to Piper while we are out of town) and a beautiful sunset!

As I sit here typing this I am again overcome with what a blessed life we have, and I'm so thankful for family, friends, and my boys (and Piper)! Happy Easter to everyone!

So this hat ended up looking like the Pharrell Hat...whoops!

Maternity Leave

Well, I just cannot believe that maternity leave has come to an end. It has been the best 12 weeks of our lives so far, and I know that while this chapter is over, each and every day only gets better with our little man. I have so many emotions about going back to work, it didn't really hit me until today when we dropped off Connor for a few hours at daycare.

We are so excited about the center that he will be at, and we know that he will be in good hands. I love my job, and I am so excited to work on City Target and our new format, Target Express, a project that I have been on since it's initial concept stage, which has been great. Work is a big part of who I am, but being a mom has definitely redefined who that person is. I hope to find a great balance between the two, to be a great working mom, it will be a journey for all of us!

I wanted to capture the highlights of these last 12 weeks at home with our little man. I have been keeping a journal every day capturing how we spend each day and key milestones, but I figured I'd only share a highight from each week for the blog, it's still kind of long, sorry! Enjoy! :)

Week 1: Most of our first week was spent in the hospital. Because of the eventful delivery (see earlier blog post) and recovery for both me and Connor, we got some quality time with daddy and doctors and nurses! We had lots of great visitors to come meet Connor. Our little dude spent most of the first week as a "glow worm" due to his jaundice after all of the bruising from delivery!

Week 2: Because I ended up having a c-section, Mike was able to take an additional week off of work to be home with us and help out. This was so great given I wasn't able to do much, like drive, or carry anything more than Connor, so it was great to have him around! We also celebrated some special birthdays during week 2, starting with Uncle Joe's 23rd birthday on Nov. 19th and cousin Kensley's 5th birthday on Nov 23rd. We enjoyed taking him out that week including his first trip to Target, and his first Friendsgiving with the ISU crew.

Connor's first restaurant experience for uncle Joe's birthday!

He was not a fan of bath time in the beginning, he loves it now!

Our little dude has been pretty chill right from the start!

Connor loves his Cousins Kensley, Mason and Emma!

Week 3: The third week of Connor's life was Thanksgiving! We were able to spend thanksgiving with both the McQuillan and Harper sides of the family. He was a huge hit at both outings, and he got lots of snuggles! Another great thing about week 3, was even though daddy had to go back to work, Grandma Mac came and hung out with me and Connor every day. It was so great to have my mom there to visit with!

Afternoons with Grandma Mac

McQuillan Thanksgiving

Harper Thanksgiving

Week 4: During week 4 we had a lot of mommy and Connor time, including our first New Momma class at Amma parenting. Little did we know at the time that this would become one of our favorite parts of maternity leave and that we would both meet friends we would have for a lifetime. Speaking of friends for a lifetime, we also had some time spent with Mike's friends from Farmington and all of their babies. It's so fun that they are all with in one year of each other!

Week 5: This week was pretty incredible, when Connor showed us just how strong he is. He rolled over one day before he turned one month. I couldn't believe it! At first I thought it was just a fluke, but he has continued to do it since then, minus a small break while gaining some chunkiness :) ...but now he's back at it and can roll over both ways from his tummy to his back, he hates tummy time!

Week 6: This was a great week because we started to get "real" smiles. Non-gas induced smiles. We also took trips into both my work and mike's work!

Week 7: Christmas took on a whole new meaning for us this year! It was so great sharing Christmas with our little man. We enjoyed get togethers with lots of family members and started our own family tradition of reading "The Night Before Christmas" on Christmas Eve, setting out milk and cookies for Santa, and opening presents under our tree on Christmas morning!

Great Grandma Glo Harper flew in from Montana to surprise us!

Harper Christmas

Santa paid Connor a special visit since we missed the McQuillan extended family Christmas!

Christmas Eve with the cousins!

Christmas morning at home with his gifts!

McQuillan Family Christmas

Week 8: For NYE we went over to the Davis's house for fondue and playtime with Connor's friends Ali and Easton. Connor decided to party and stayed up until 11:59, at which point he passed out!

Approximately 11:59

Week 9: January proved to be one of the coldest months I can remember. The first deep freeze due to the Polar Vortex happened during week 9. We stayed in and didn't go anywhere for 3 long days! Connor didn't mind, he was as smiley as ever, and we discovered his love for music! We also moved Connor to the crib this week, the first two nights were rough, but every since then he has been a champ! He loves his Halo swaddles and he only wakes up 1 or 2 times a night!

Week 10: This was a busy week! It was our last new mom class at Amma, which was extremely sad! We also had Connor's 2 month check up, and he measured up to be a BIG healthy boy, 14lbs. 2oz!! We also took Connor to his first Wild game, which was SO much fun! I'm hoping his love for hockey is firmly established! :)

Week 11: We discovered mom and baby yoga at Blooma about week 9, and it became part of our regular routine, once we could get out of the house and escape the cold. Connor LOVES it, especially some of the massage and stretches that help him get out some of his gas!

Week 12: On this last week of maternity leave, I have been soaking up every single snuggle and cuddle that I can. We have gotten together with lots of friends this last week, enjoyed mom and baby yoga, and done a trial run at daycare. I can't believe how fast time has gone, how quickly he has grown and changed and how I am overwhelmed by love every time I look at him. We are just so blessed, and I have been so blessed to have a husband who has allowed me to have this time with our son, and a job that allows me to take this time, and is welcoming me back with open arms. I know the best parts of my day will continue to be every minute spent with this little man, and I look forward to coming home to him every night!

Wish us luck!